Thursday, April 15, 2004

Pivik by popular demand

The Wisdom gets a lot of traffic from Google searches on "Jessica Pivik", so I guess I have a civic duty to keep up the commentary.

Plus, this "Ann" (or is it "Jessica") person keeps dropping in to leave comments supporting Pivik, so who am I do deny the public this forum?

[editor's note: The last comment "Ann" left read in part: "Isn't the experience of writing for a college newspaper is all about kearning how to write." I really hope she's not an LSU student, but I imagine she is.]

So this week, Jessica attacks the very hot and never-before-written-about topic of platonic friends.

Her attempt to sound like Carrie Bradshaw this week is:
"Platonic friendships are like lubricants; there are the good, the bad and the cherry-flavored. And, they will all put you in a slippery situation."

She quotes "students" on the chances that a guy and girl can be just friends, steals a quote from a CosmoGIRL editor and only manages to work in one other "shocking" reference (a Chris Rock quote with "dick" in it) in addition to her oh-so-clever lubricant line.

There's an odd Michael Jackson line ("Is Michael Jackson a pedophile?") and her brilliant summation in which she makes an incorrect reference to a song written 15 years before she was born:
"Until the day comes that you are mature enough to have a platonic friendship, take the advice of Stephen Stills: 'Love The One You're With.'"

I guess she's saying that you should just screw your friends to avoid any complications that might come along by not screwing your friends? Insightful, that Jessica.

[editor's note 2: "Love The One You're With" is about hippies and "free love." It's not about having sex with otherwise platonic friends. The line "If you can't be with the one you love ... love the one you're with" is a - rather obvious - clue to the meaning of the song.]

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